Guess who is two months!
and fat and adorable.
KO that ^^ was a month ago I am seriously slacking!
SO
In the last two months let me think of EVERYTHING that has happened.
FIRST
My gallbladder. My no good, lousy, painful gallbladder.
I had it removed on October 4th. So I will tell you everything that led up to that!
The first time I had an attack I thought I had pulled a muscle in my back.
It was the middle of the night and I had to wake Lilly up to nurse. We'll I'm in the middle of changing her diaper and I get this horrific SHOOTING pain in my back that sent me to my knees. Its really bad bad but I manage to stand back up and change her diaper. I wake Sam up and tell him you have got to take her I'm in so much pain I think I pulled a muscle in my back.
We thought maybe since I had lost 30 lbs so fast that my back was reacting to it weirdly.
I took a Motrin and went to sleep.
The next day I woke up and I was feeling fine
A couple of nights later I get done nursing Lilly (by nursing I usually mean pumping and giving her a bottle) and another one came one. I of course wake Sam up again and give Lilly to him. This one is SO bad that I'm whining like a baby on the bed. He kept asking whats wrong whats wrong?! I keep saying I don't know! I don't know!
At this point were wondering if it has something to do with nursing/pumping.
I write on my facebook about it happening and A LOT of people told me it could be your gallbladder. I go on WEBMD to look up all of the stuff and it is EXACTLY the pain I was having.
I take a Motrin and put an icepack on my back and after 30 minutes it fades and I fall asleep.
It happened one more time and I decided OK its time to see a doctor.
I get in the next day at 11am. The doctor (not my normal doctor that I love) I have is nice and she says we will most likely do surgery go get your ultrasound done to confirm its gallstones and we'll go from there.
I leave my appointment and I felt weird about it. Why was she so quick to jump on the surgery band wagon. Why was she SO SURE that its gallstones. I think she just wanted me out of her hair. She just seemed surgery happy. I decided I wasn't going to get the blood test done or the ultrasound. I didn't want unnecessary surgery just BC they wont take the time to figure out whats wrong.
So I Don't.
TMI BELOW DO NOT READ IF YOUR SQUEAMISH
In the mean time my urine had started to turn BRIGHT ORANGE almost like orange pop and I was producing white stool.
TMI OVER
About a week later when Lilly was 6 weeks old Sam and I are scrounging in the cabinets we decide on Tuna cheesy pasta. We make it and eat it and RIGHT after my last bite I get a belly ache. I try laying on the couch and it still really hurts. I went to the bathroom and it still really hurts. I go upstairs and lay in bed. By this time I'm doubled over and having trouble breathing and feel like I'm going to throw up.
I get out of bed and sit in the chair in our room.
I get back in bed
I try the bathroom.
I get back in the chair
I kid you not I started screaming OW OW oh my gosh OW OWWWW
Sam came upstairs with Lilly and I am on my hands and knees yelling out in pain screaming.
I kept saying I'm dying! I'm dying! (whoa is me! haha)
Sam calm as ever says you're not dying you are OK get up and I am taking you to the ER.
The funny part is I was in SOOO much pain but absolutely insistent on putting on a bra LOL
Sam was like it doesn't matter who cares you are going to the er!
I was crying but you bet I put that stupid thing on lol.
Well halfway to the hospital the attack subsides and I feel so much better. We get to the er and get called back right away. I thank God for that BC I was still in a lot of pain and couldn't sit, but WAY better than being mid attack.
I get back there they take my blood put a IV in and we wait. The doctor FINALLY came in and said that it most likely is my gallstone and they are going to do an ultrasound to check for stones. We wait for a few hours and they come in to tell us their machine is broken and I will have to get it done on base. I am discharged with vicodin (couldn't take anyway bc I was breastfeeding) I am incredibly sore but we get in the car and go home.
I call the next morning for my ultrasound THANKFULLY the order for it was still in from when I went to the doctors last time but never followed through bc I thought I knew better than her ....ppfft lol
I schedule it for
Monday at 730am and I go in and the tech says I have TONS of stones. They tell me to wait about 2 days when the results will be in the system and call my doctor to make a follow up appointment about the ultrasound.
I get home and go upstairs to Sam who is snuggling with Lilly and tell him about the ultrasound, grab Lilly and come downstairs to start my day. My phone rings it is a nurse at the doctors office saying that radiology had called and it was so severe they didn't want me to wait the few days to get the ball rolling. He said he wanted to set me up for a surgery consult and would call back with a time and day.
He calls back about 15 minutes later and says that my appointment is
Wednesday at 10am.
I go in Wednesday and she examines me and pushes on me where my gallbladder is OUCH and says OK lets schedule surgery.
We go out in the hallway to schedule and she says I REALLY want to get you in tomorrow morning.
Not even flipping kidding my heart dropped.
Sam pushed me to say yes knowing that if I waited any longer I would have bad anxiety about it. He knows me too well.
The morning at 6am I wake up and have to shower and all that. I get there and change into my gown give my Lilly a kiss and give Sam a kiss. About an hour later they come back to get me and Sam is on the phone with his mom. They don't even say anything to me and put anesthesia in my IV. I start to panic BC I haven't kissed Lilly again yet or hugged and kissed Sam. I can feel that I'm fading and I'm like Sam get off the phone and he keeps talking and I'm like GET OFF THE PHONE!!!!!!!!! STOP TALKING!!!!!!! I was so scared that if I would die I would have never gotten the chance to say goodbye to him. (dramatic I know) They wheel me out of the room and I conk out. I semi remember them asking if I was warm enough in the OR. Then they put something over my face and I remember them putting my arms out in a T and the nurse strapped my wrist weird and the other nurse corrected her and made her re strap it.
I woke up in the recovery ward. It was literally just a HUGE room with people in beds everywhere not private or anything. It was like an old day hospital where there is an aisle down the middle and beds underneath the windows on the left and right side of the room.
anyways the first thing I said when I woke up was "how's my munchkin" obviously talking about Lilly. I'm not sure why I asked that but I think I remember thinking she was the one who had surgery for some reason.
I drift in and out and yell for pain meds lol
When they finally wheel me up to my room not even kidding it takes my nurse FOREVER to come see me and I am in SO much pain BC my meds had worn off. I'm was yelling please ow please!
She finally comes in and gives me medicine and I feel so much better.
They let me rest for a while and then the doctor comes in to tell me I have 2 stones stuck in my bile duct and have to have surgery again and they will let me know when.
They inform it will be 4pm the NEXT day and I am not allowed to eat or drink anything after 12.
The next day at 6pm they come to get me to wheel me down for my surgery and the doctor doesn't show up for another hour!
I remember being SO nervous about waking up in it. It happened to a friend of mine in her second surgery and It was my BIGGEST fear. I kept telling her please don't let me wake up please.
I sat on the edge of the table and they told me I have to be on my stomach for this procedure (yep! lay on the stomach that I just had surgery on! ouch) Well I'm trying to lay on my stomach but I'm in SO much pain they give me pain meds and administer the anesthesia at the same time. I don't remember anything else but waking back up on the recovery gurney on my back and feeling 100000% better. The first thing I said was Thank you SO MUCH Angela I didn't wake up!! I DIDN'T WAKE UP!! THEN I was like I wander how they got me flipped over on this bed. They must have saw my butt and all the goods and I have no clue why but I was embarrassed about that lol
I get back into my recovery room the private one lol and I am seriously almost hyper BC I feel so good and all the pain is gone. I stay another day and then I go home and feeling good to this day!
This was right after my second surgery. You can tell how jaundice I was bc my bile duct was blocked causing a build up of billirubin.
I felt SO much better and was on A LOT of pain meds lol
I had glue and internal stitches
I had 4 incisions
This is right under my chest. This scar is the one they pulled the gallbladder out of.
This one has taken the longest time to heal and I had a stitch sticking out of it that I pulled out. (Dont mind my Mommy marks lol) I was so bloated after the surgery bc they puff you full of gas
But Im pretty much all healed now and I feel SO much better but I cant eat beef and anything to greasy or I get a bad belly ache.
Lilly also officially turned two months and was due for her two month shots!
She cried and her face turned so bright red it was absolutely heartbreaking. I didnt cry though =] YAY me!
cute little band aids
Later that month was HALLOWEEN!
Lillians first Halloween to be exact.
Little Red Riding Hood
Cuteness baby girl!
My Mom came for thanksgiving YAY
She couldnt keep her hands of Lilly!
This is only the second time she has ever seen her!
When she first saw her at the airport
I had a surprise for my Mom when she arrived.
A personalized onesie!
She caught a little cold when the weather turned cold.
OH YEA!
Something I forgot to mention was Lillys Lip Tie!
I talked to her PED about and she said that it was too vascular and she had to be sent to an ENT.
We went and he said that she is too young to clip and if we did it we would have to put her under. I decided it wasnt worth it.
I also decided that I was going to stop trying to breastfeed. This was a decision that I really struggled with. Lilly could never latch on BC her tie was so severe so I was pumping every two hours which was EXHAUSTING. I had a decent supply but could never seem to build a stash. When I had my gallbladder out they told me I would be on pain killers and antibiotics and shouldnt be breastfeeding. Since I would have to stop BFing for 10 days without a stash she would have to be formula fed anyways.
Sam and I had a long talk about and decided we were going to make the official switch to full on formula feeding. When I wrote about her appointment and our decision on our facebook i specifically said NO ADVICE IS NEEDED! and OF COURSE someone had to say well try this or you can say this. There are ways around this. That BOILED my blood so bad. I had just said no advice we had made up our mind. She has since been deleted bc she always has something to say about anything parenting.
I kept feeling guilty about my decision and I couldn't figure out why. I finally thought about it and it wasnt bc I felt like I was failing Lilly. She was thriving and her jaundice was gone after 2 months. I realized I was feeling bad bc of the pressure from other moms. They acted like I was poisoning my baby and obviously I was not. I would read articles and moms would say these horrible nasty things. I better get off this topic before I ramble on and get angry lol
But so many of my facebook friends left such kind hearted comments on my page and I realized they were the friends who mattered.
Lilly is most important is she was fed and happy and healthy then who cares. The mean ones can kiss my booty haha =]
Next was Thanksgiving
Perfect turkey two years in a row!
My turkeys butt first thanksgiving she was talking in this picture
I'll leave the blog at this cute freaking picture of my baby girl hanging out with Santa!